God's First Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Your Source of Daily Encouragement and Inspiration From God's Word

I wanna be FREE!

on July 25, 2011

So done with being held captive by my own imagination

A mind in bondage by imagery that society and culture indoctrinated in me

Who gets to say who I should be when I know all that I could be

Release me from this incarceration that’s threatening slow death

Who sentenced me to life with no chance for parole

Put in a cage with no walls, but barred in by my own consciousness

As troubled as I sound, at least I’m embracing the truth

How many spend an entire lifetime living in perfect denial

Acting as though they have control over their lives

You think  that you think but your thoughts are stolen or borrowed from someone else

Been using em so long you don’t even realize they were never yours

Who gets to say who we should be when we know all that we could be

Sold into slavery the day I was born

Tagged like cattle placed in selected divisions, “girl”, “black” etcetera

Told how I must live and all I must do to fulfill the demands of my category

A world where Satan rules by deceit, has chained me in defeat

And for so long I bought the great lie, let myself be denied emancipation

No more, no more I say

I’ve merely tasted freedom, just with the tip of my tongue

It’s too sweet to let slip away

And though I say this, it still isn’t mine only because I keep walking on and leaving it behind

Oh why do I cry senseless tears that never ever escape my fears

But just console them for the moment because really I’m comfortable in my insecurities

I don’t have to try to be anything better and fail, far too frail and afraid to face possible defeat

You get to say who I should be though I know all that I could be

I let you dictate to me, I listen to your insults even when I know you yourself don’t believe

It’s just easier this way I suppose, it’s what I’ve grown used to

A world that says I’m not good enough the way that my God created me

And I know He’s ashamed of me because I’m ashamed of Him

I’ve turned my back on His goodness

I’ve spit in the face of His grace

He should get to say who I am cause He enables all that I can be

But I’m constantly tying His hands.

 

This reflection probably sounds really really dark to you.  Please don’t think that I’m in a depressive state or that I’ve given up on God in any way.  This is merely my way of expressing the bondage and reality of the sin of insecurity.  It’s a raw expression of how we should look at ourselves when we feel like we’re not good enough or feel insecure because the fact is that feeling is not of God.  When we allow it to control our lives and shape the people who are, Satan wins and friends, Satan is not a winner ok, he’s a loser…the biggest loser.  We are victors, but only when we decide to allow Christ full reign and accept the freedom he has offered us.  This reflection was harsh I know, but so is living in bondage to sin your entire life and even more so will be the reality of Hell should we not let go and let God take control.  As I struggle through my own battles with insecurities and attempt to day by day give control of my life back to God, I pray that each of you would also reflect on where Satan and his world systems of lies is defeating and entrapping you and take a step in the direction of the open door the Lord has unlocked in order for you to be free.

Romans 20, 21 For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope  that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.

 

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